this is a story

For the avenger

And God willing I fear not the Abyss.

How could you possibly not pick up on my drift?

Avenger had an anti-AI, by the way. Shit. It's all good though, because me and Scott bought bubble pipes, so we're prepared now. The pipes are positively delicious.

Your drift is heavy. Help me out.

somehow i didn't see you all day. where were you? my eyes are understimulated, having seen not one pair of metallic pants in at least 24 hours.

hey, i signed you up for auditions. have a one-minute monologue prepared for tuesday. not necessarily memorized. please. you're basically already in my play (if you want to be, anyway. i'm terrified of you reading it. do you want to read it? jeff, its crazy, but you intimidate me to an extent).

i'ma go reanalyze your lengthy obtusenesses. but seriously. i requested a list of the rules, and i wasn't kidding. i think we all know what this means.

All I get is anti-AI

There really are no rules, except that I prefer to write with a good deal of opacity. How could there be rules for either of us to follow?

I'd be happy to be in your play, if you'll take me. I guess I'm equally terrified of a peer review of my acting talent. I'd love to read your play. I was at Allen & Son's for lunch (managed to eke out a vegetarian meal, no less).

Man, I just got furious last night. I hate hanging out with people who are fucked up, and gunwitch's advice makes me super irritable. I've got all kinds of material for being a PUA, but it's all designed to deal with people you don't already know. Ladder-jumping techniques are nearly nonexistent, and all that is known about it is that a successful jump is exceedingly rare. Not to mention that Sam put on The Doors (the movie) for us to watch at around midnight, which left a bitter aftertaste of terrible movie. He was really apologetic about it though, at least. The only redeeming characteristic about that whole night was hanging out with Sam and Dave, and playing drums poorly. I should have just gone and hung out with my other drunk friends, Chaney and Scott.

After last night, I'm fairly certain that I need a PAWN to make my game actually viable. I don't want to be super shallow in doing it, nor have too great ladder disparity, but that too is losing viability rapidly. The situation needs greater objectivity.

Sorry to be an asshole and lay all my shit on you.

Re: All I get is anti-AI

you're getting intense.

as for my play, of course i'll take you, don't be a dweeb. as i recall, your acting abilities are completely and totally all terrain (then again: i was 13 when last i saw you act. what was my taste like when i was 13? can i trust that?) (no matter. i trust you). i spent hours revising the play last night, and i think it's come out better, but i'm concerned because everyone really liked it before. what if i killed it? is that even really possible?

by the way: i totally got invited to caleb's whatever birthday thing, which from this point onward will be referred to as WBT (those freaking acronyms are mocking me, start a list, these are mine). i was invited to said WBT by one jake axelbank. i really did consider going. i even wanted to go. why? (long pause) why?

all there is after that is intensity, and i'm thinking about things that are in booklets and pamphlets. i'd love to do the research, take the notes, but i don't have the booklets or pamphlets, and i don't know where to get them. if i did know where to get them, i wouldn't even know which ones to get. which just proves how intensely out of the intensity loop i am when it comes to everything that's not in my brain already. as for things that are in my brain already--i'm pretty on top of that stuff. like nobody's biznass. but everything else makes me look like a fool.

Re: All I get is anti-AI

i was lying. i found the pamphlets. i found the booklets. i'm taking notes. suddenly your drifts are not so heavy, and i can pick them up. well, i can shift them around a bit. watch out, jeff! i'm finally learning to read.

I guess I have a few pamphlets

But all they do is make me emo. The style they teach is not my forte, but I suppose I will give them more effort. The simple fact of the matter is that they are not geared to help me in my specific situation. All they can tell me about it is how difficult it is. I tend to focus on my missed opportunities and shortcomings. I hate being pessimistic, and I especially find loathsome whining to other people. There will be a solution, but it will come either by surprise or in some time. Maybe I won't even have to debase myself. Turns out it was Chaney's copy of Perks. Fancy that.


Meanwhile: I really want to get over to Sam's house to spend the night, and my mother would like nothing worse.

Fancy THIS!

jeff, there are two new rules. i wrote them, and though it seems unfair now, someday you'll understand why you have to live according to my rules. ready? won, to, three:

rule #1: the absence of pamphlets is the new pamphlets. pamphlets are out. no one needed them in the first place, especially not you.

rule #2: whining to other people is in. why would you ever be against it?

not to mention that your specificity, or lack thereof (but only in situations in which you've already been specific), is totally out of order. you have to start out less specific and then move towards real concrete specificities. you can't just start out with a specific (ex: use of the phrase "my specific situation") and then spiral out into nothingness, where context goes to die.

follow these rules and you'll have no need for any other. thank god for rules, otherwise we'd be sitting around waiting for a solution. they don't surprise you. you have to make them yourself.